So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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