we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
