my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Drunk is not a location!
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize