I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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