I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
