don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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