I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
