My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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