who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Randomize
