I must be too annoying 4 u.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize