he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
They have beer where we have blood.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
