my mouth tastes like poor choices
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
