Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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