You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
