Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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