She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize