I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
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