White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
So much Jack, so little girl.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
