Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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