I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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