Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize
