You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
