Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
he was CRYING into my vagina
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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