I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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