i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
