Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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