...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
