11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
