I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
