yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
There's a naked man in my car right now.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
