Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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