Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize