i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
