Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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