YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
