Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
