I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
