Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
