how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
