So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
