Sponge bath it is.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
