just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
