Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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