ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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