dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
