okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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