well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
