I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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