i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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