i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
