yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
